The talk show host said she has been able to ‘release’ the ‘shame’ she carried about her weight during her ABC special ‘An Oprah Special: Shame, Blame and the Weight Loss Revolution’

Oprah Winfrey is sharing the close to home cost that times of yo abstaining from excessive food intake, and negative remarks encompassing her fruitless endeavors at weight reduction, took on her.

During her new ABC exceptional, An Oprah Extraordinary: Disgrace, Fault and the Weight reduction Upheaval, the moderator, 70, got close to home while addressing her own battles with weight reduction throughout the long term — including how she battled to keep the load off after the scandalous second on her television show when she thinned down and rolled out a cart stacked with fat to address the pounds that she had shedded.

“In an effort to combat all the shame, I starved myself for nearly five months and then wheeled out that wagon of fat that the internet will never forget,” Winfrey said of the moment in 1988. “After losing 67 pounds on [a] liquid diet, the next day, the very next day, I started to gain it back. Feeling the shame of fighting a losing battle with weight, is a story all too familiar.”

Winfrey also recalled how she was “ridiculed on every late-night talk show for 25 years” and shared some of the headlines that she claimed were written about her at the time, including “Oprah: Fatter Than Ever” and “Oprah Warned Diet or Die.”

The philanthropist, who has been open about the countless diets she has tried over the years to combat her weight, then went on to explain her mindset at the time and how it has changed years later.

“All these years, I thought all of the people who never had to diet were just using their willpower and they were for some reason stronger than me,” she told one guest on the show.

“And now I realize y’all weren’t even thinking about the food,” she continued. “It’s not that you had the willpower. You weren’t thinking about it. You weren’t obsessing about it. That is the big thing I learned.”

During the hour-long special, Winfrey shared testimonials from audience members on the struggles they’ve had with their weight and also got experts to weigh in on the prescription weight-loss medications — which she told PEOPLE she was taking in December — like Ozempic and Mounjaro.

“I now use it as I feel I need it, as a tool to manage not yo-yoing,” Winfrey told PEOPLE of the weight-loss medication in December. “The fact that there’s a medically approved prescription for managing weight and staying healthier, in my lifetime, feels like relief, like redemption, like a gift, and not something to hide behind and once again be ridiculed for. I’m absolutely done with the shaming from other people and particularly myself.”

Elsewhere during the special, Winfrey also shared that after several decades, she eventually reframed her mindset on obesity as a “disease not a character flaw.”

“There is now a sense of hope, No. 1, and No. 2, you no longer blame yourself,” Winfrey explained of her new logic. “When I tell you how many times I have blamed myself because you think, ‘I’m smart enough to figure this out,’ and then to hear all along, it’s you fighting your brain.”

Later in the episode, Winfrey opened up about how much lighter she felt after making that realization and getting everything off her chest.

“The thing that’s been the biggest relief for me, and I hope that many of you watching this episode of Shame and Blame, will release the shame for yourself,” she said. “Because I, as I said at the beginning of this, took on the same for myself and carried it for myself.”

She added, “And now that I know that I’m just holding my breath underwater, I have been able to release that shame, and it doesn’t matter what anybody says.”